Non-scale victories were mentioned at this week’s meeting
(My first weigh in and I lost 4.5lbs...Yay me!). When the scales aren’t showing you what you’d
hoped for, look for the other little victories that have come as a result of
your weight loss...for instance your clothes being too loose, or your bum not
hanging over the edges of chairs anymore.
I liked this idea, because after just one week, and even though the
scales were being kind (this time), I had a non-scale victory. For the first time since I was in my early
twenties, a man in the pub offered to buy me a drink.
This might not seem like much, but for me it
was. Now I should stress that I haven’t
been beaten by the ugly stick or anything like that, but nowadays guys just
don’t offer to buy drinks. Gender
equality, for all the marvelous good it has done, has unfortunately also
killed chivalry. Now I’m no princess,
and whilst I’d never say that I expected
a man to hold the door for me, or give up his seat for me in a crowded waiting
room; The traditionalist inside me silently judges those men who don’t at least
offer.
As a divorced woman in her early thirties, I am of course
always keeping my eyes open for my next victim...*coughs* I mean, my next Mr
Right, and without basic manners, and at list a hint of charm, I’m genuinely
not interested. I’d rather buy a cat (or six).
I assume guys look at a girl like me and think: when there are so many
girls willing to give up everything for free, why would I buy her a drink when
I can’t guarantee it’ll get me anywhere?
They only tend to risk making that investment on girls who really stand
out as knowing their own worth, because those women appear intriguing and
challenging in the best of ways. I
unfortunately, don’t think I’m usually that woman! Don’t get me wrong, I can see why guys are
like this now. It could get very
expensive if they had to buy a drink for every girl they wanted to chat up, but
I do think it’s a shame, because usually the ones who appreciate that
chivalrous act are the ones who would be worth the investment.
 |
| You've got this buddy! |
The drink for me was a non-scale victory. In that moment as I chatted to him at the
bar, I must have exuded confidence in my appearance and myself generally, due
to the fact I was high on the success of my first week of the plan. Even more though, I was flattered that he’d
made the gesture...that he’d seen
something I hadn’t up to this point. It’s
important to remember though, that in the spirit of equality, it’s not just
down to the guys to make these gestures, and in a female dominated environment
such as a weight loss club, the gestures we
make towards the men in group are just as important. I witnessed a genuinely touching act of
support between two members at the meeting this week, which actually led to the
discussion of non-scale victories. Perhaps it was just me, but I couldn’t help
but feel that choosing to come to a group, and regularly surrounding yourselves with strangers willing to make
those supportive gestures (let's face it, when you need them the most!), is in fact the biggest
non-scale victory we can claim. Because
after all...it was our decision to suck it up and walk through the doors in the first place...so that little victory belongs to each and every one of us.
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